when the feel comes

i took a ton of photos at work today but none of them work out
color scheme color scheme.. not me not me.. yes yes..
sometimes you just gotta keep telling yourself lies to make yourself feel better because people will always try to bring you down. they come tell you things about yourself that you don't actually wish to know. they rip your mind apart making you feel like.. why am i not like myself anymore.
but no. somedays you just gotta fuck whatever they say and just do whatever you feel like doing. eat whatever you want. wear whatever you want. say whatever the hell you need to say.

feeling quite under the weather (still). must be that sometimes-blocked-sometimes-runny nose of mine. made omu soba and it taste sooooo deliciousssss. the mayo played SUCH a big part.
so happy to use the self service check out system at the supermarket
even though i get to scan items at work too, but don't you find scanning items and hearing that 'beep' can be so satisfying at times?
maybe its just me

waiting for the drowsiness to kick in...
listening to two weeks by FKA twigs now on spotify
i wish i can have better results everytime i google "nice indie playlist 2015"
maybe i can try "nice bands that sounds like made in heights or little dragons"
google you're suppose to do your job

don't forget

 yesterday was a special day
so he took me out on a ramen date
we have been talking about this ramen date since a month ago when he was about to come home from Japan
but two sloths can't seem to move around after they are back from travelling
so the ramen date kept getting delayed
and i had one of the best ramen
that pork belly melting in my mouth
it was nice
especially observing how he eats
how he saved that piece of pork belly for the last
how happy he got because of the pork belly
it was nice!
i got myself a maccha ice cream along the way
it isn't how i wanted
poor boy had to eat it instead
and don't forget my white dress got black inked.

and i was just doing school work for a few hours.. clearing assignments.. more pimples popping out.. its like a norm now to listen to made in heights every time i'm working on something or being messed up. but i really need some new songs or bands to listen to. the bands i listen to whenever i'm on the go basically rotates between purity ring, made in heights, lykke li and little dragons.

i bought Yes Please recently and now its sitting on my bedside table

i will get back to you soon i promise

words

some days it makes you feel so precious
like none of it will ever hurt you
some days it makes you feel like maybe you shouldn't be this way
maybe you should back off
maybe you should calm it down
maybe you should go somewhere and breathe instead

speaking about breathing, my nose is so blocked right now and everything feels clogged up in my throat. i'm usually the kind to be sick for just 2 days especially cough but i don't know why is this taking so long..
i hope i fall asleep easy.
i hope i dream of something good.
i hope i will be able to remember it.

learn to live edna learn to live

in bed

i have nothing on today and thats something new
i have been running around so much and there will always be one day in the month that i won't have anything on
and thats great
because i'm sick right now and i can't get out of bed
you should see how lazy i am even when i'm typing this
just lying here, with the laptop sitting on me. waiting for my noodles to be ready while listening to creep by radiohead
i have 3 assignments due next week but my mind is telling me not now
just not now
i can't deal with any of it
im probably gonna lie down here, watch a few episodes of friends and then the night will come
oh dear i sound so lazy...
zzzzzzzzzz..zzzz.z.z.z...z.z.z...

i need to do my assignments...................
but.... . . . . . .. .. ugh

26

and you 

this you beside me 

is the only person i can see

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------you----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------fill-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------them---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------they----------------------------------------------------------------------drown--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------you-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

see light

i have been so unproductive these days 

haven't checked any stuff on my to-do list. spectacles not done, lens filter not bought 

i must have walked too much in bangkok that i kinda need a month to recover from it

realized that zhen zhu fang isn't pearl centre today but why

why is zhen zhu fang people's complex??? logic logic 

bus ride

he tried to hold your hands
and then when he managed to hold them, you let it go
little boy, one day you'll regret
you'll regret not holding on to his hands
even though wrinkly
you'll regret holding that card of yours
and not his hands
because till date
i still miss his thick wrinkly hands
his hair all white and grey
his smile with a few decayed tooth

the past and good coffee

school has finally kickstart, it seems like a long wait with so many back and forth working shifts throughout but then again seems like just yesterday that i've just decided on letting go of my business degree

classes have been great and i can foresee myself enjoying being busy with assignments too 

maybe because i know i'll always have you by my side no matter how stressed up i will be 

and i know you'll definitely make things peaceful again

--

we went to csh to grab small bites, drank coffee and talk about life 

coffee was amazing as usual 

that earl grey cheesecake make such great combo with the coffee

his favourite song was on

he was so happy

i am so happy

everything was so perfect

and it will always be

whirrrrrlllll

today has been soooo shitty for me. you know one of those days you got when you are doing nothing but it seems like you went through a lot with your thoughts and so many crazy things going on in your head to screw you even further. making you feel like shit, making you feel unworthy of yourself.. 

yeah this kinda day sucks

well its not like I had nothing much to do, i was at work and i really wish more people would come in all the time to keep myself occupied. I was so happy to see kids come in. can you imagine? on normal days i would be like "just give me a break" 

it was one of those day where you just wanna be like "fuck it" to everything you can possible. just say fuck it to everything and get home and lie on the floor. which i did. it felt so good to be able to lie down on this very nice wooden floor. it was so cooling. then i spread out my hair and see how stupid i actually looked. then i went to play some made in heights to keep myself calm in this darkness. maybe i should take a really long bath. 

a realllly long one that my skin might wrinkle when i get out of it. 

why is made in heights so nice to listen to

its like my go to band whenever i feel so shitty about myself 

i just want to take a bath right now

wait for tomorrow to come

with sunlight on my face

just a random day of mine -

waking up, hearing his voice 

not to mention i have to wake up at 10am almost everyday because of that construction work going on all that drillings goodnesssssss

cleared my lakerols in my bag once again 

picked up my sushi phone casing 

satisfied my pineapple fried rice and matcha cake craving

taking bus with that favourite spot where the sun shines on my face and my favourite song by daughter

walked around the neighbourhood for a bit

climbed a flight of stairs and then realised that i don't actually have to do it.. like what for right? 

\(^^)/